the jane

ugh
Thursday, February 17, 2005

my roll of color film that has photos from The Gates is missing.. I think it got knocked into my garbage can, which has already been thrown out. I am hating myself now.. hating everything. There were some images on that roll that I really wanted.. whether it was aestetically good or not, it just contained moments I wanted to keep. There was this image of a father holding his baby daughter up to the saffron gates.. and that image was the most important to me on that roll..

I pray that it's somewhere and I'll find it.

i'm crying over this too, it's insane..

EDIT:
so I thought about how shitty my mood was and the cry was much needed. It's also been the stress I've been putting on myself w/ this Time Arts project.. that basically threw me into a whirlwind of negative emotions.

I found it amazing that I was crying over a roll of film. It made me realize that art is so important in my life that I definitely cant do anything else for my life. I remember in JHS when I was soo unsure about what HS I was gonna go to. I wanted to get into the smart schools and be the daughter that my mom always wanted; working at a bank and such.. but she's happy w/ this daughter being all poor and artsified. I like having the freedom that art comes with.. and the possibilities of change, risks, and the determination to be happy with your work.

I still havent found my roll of film..I'll miss it and unconsciously think of it but for now, I'll have to go on w/ my exciting life at Syracuse. sooo exciting.

damn long posts nowadays.

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ugh Thursday, February 17, 2005 my roll of color film that has photos from The Gates is missing.. I think it got knocked into my garbage can, which has already been thrown out. I am hating myself now.. hating everything. There were some images on that roll that I really wanted.. whether it was aestetically good or not, it just contained moments I wanted to keep. There was this image of a father holding his baby daughter up to the saffron gates.. and that image was the most important to me on that roll.. I pray that it's somewhere and I'll find it. i'm crying over this too, it's insane.. EDIT: so I thought about how shitty my mood was and the cry was much needed. It's also been the stress I've been putting on myself w/ this Time Arts project.. that basically threw me into a whirlwind of negative emotions. I found it amazing that I was crying over a roll of film. It made me realize that art is so important in my life that I definitely cant do anything else for my life. I remember in JHS when I was soo unsure about what HS I was gonna go to. I wanted to get into the smart schools and be the daughter that my mom always wanted; working at a bank and such.. but she's happy w/ this daughter being all poor and artsified. I like having the freedom that art comes with.. and the possibilities of change, risks, and the determination to be happy with your work. I still havent found my roll of film..I'll miss it and unconsciously think of it but for now, I'll have to go on w/ my exciting life at Syracuse. sooo exciting. damn long posts nowadays. posted by Jane Tam at 11:47 PM ......................................................................................................... 0 Comments: Post a Comment << Home					About Jane Tam has moved to a different domain. Please forward your links to http://janetam.com. Jane is a 21 year old Photography student placed in Syracuse University but originally from New York City. She enjoys all sorts of music but you can classify her as the stereotypical indie kid. Slightly offensive and bitter sometimes, this blog is a place to vent frustrations but also a blog to display current photo/art projects as well as encourage new talent from music to art to films; basically whatever tickles Jane's fancy. Archives 12/2004 01/2005 02/2005 03/2005 04/2005 05/2005 06/2005 07/2005 08/2005 09/2005 10/2005 11/2005 12/2005 01/2006 02/2006 03/2006 04/2006 05/2006 06/2006 07/2006 08/2006 09/2006 10/2006 11/2006 12/2006 01/2007 02/2007 03/2007 04/2007 05/2007 06/2007 08/2007 09/2007 10/2007 11/2007 www.flickr.com This is a Flickr badge showing public photos from thejane. Make your own badge here.